January 2012
December 2011
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people: are you mad/sad or something?
me: this is just my face
jamaicabobsled:
A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks “Why the long face?”. The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables
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omg there’s this kid in my school who says he’s a vegetarian but he eats fish and i was like that doesn’t make any sense and he was like no it’s okay cause it’s biblical food and i was like didn’t you say you were an atheist and he was like uh whatever ugh also i’m bi txt it bitch xoxo
vegitarian. but i eat fish and chicken
– you’re an idiot (via tesno)
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America: We believe in equality for religion, rights, race, and respect everyone!
Gays: Sweet! So can we get marrie-
America: NO.
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fullmetalexorcist:
iwantallah:
amanda bynes teaching her parrot to speak japanese
fuck. I love you Amanda Bynes
OTANJOUBI OMEDETOU
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my mom: hey r u going out today
me: no its already 2... 2 LATE AHAHHGAGHAHGHAHUGHHAHAHHA
my mom: this is why u have no friends
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Reblog if you're ugly.
jumbojelly:
smileysammi:
holyshit look at the notes.
HELLO EVERYONE MY NAME IS SPONGE AND I HAVE BEEN UGLY FOR ABOUT 16 YEARS NOW
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ericwhoreman:
Jim, you’re 6’11” and you weigh 90lbs, Gumby has a better body than you, boom, roasted. Dwight you’re a kiss ass, boom roasted. Pam you failed art school, boom roasted. Meredith, you slept with so many guys you’re starting to look like one, boom roasted. Kevin, I can’t decide between a fat joke and a dumb joke, boom roasted. Creed, your teeth called, your breath stinks, boom...
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Biology Teacher: So the sperm is surrounded with glucose
student: you mean semen is like sugar?
Biology Teacher: yeah basically
me: doesn't taste like..
Biology Teacher:
me:
student:
Biology Teacher:
me:
student:
me: whoops
sailorsodomy:
meiotic:
that one fat black girl that doesn’t give a shit about anything
everyone in my school
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i’m sorry guys but if you don’t like best coast then we are no longer friends
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