A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks “Why the long face?”. The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables
omg there’s this kid in my school who says he’s a vegetarian but he eats fish and i was like that doesn’t make any sense and he was like no it’s okay cause it’s biblical food and i was like didn’t you say you were an atheist and he was like uh whatever ugh also i’m bi txt it bitch xoxo
Jim, you’re 6’11” and you weigh 90lbs, Gumby has a better body than you, boom, roasted. Dwight you’re a kiss ass, boom roasted. Pam you failed art school, boom roasted. Meredith, you slept with so many guys you’re starting to look like one, boom roasted. Kevin, I can’t decide between a fat joke and a dumb joke, boom roasted. Creed, your teeth called, your breath stinks, boom roasted. Angela, where’s Angela , well there you are, I didn’t see you behind that grain of rice, boom roasted. Stanley you crush your wife during sex and your heart sucks, boom roasted. Oscar, you’re gay. Andy, Cornell called they think you suck and you’re gayer than Oscar, boom roasted.